Okay, this is some funny shit. On Friday, my good friend Evan sent me a text message saying he was planning on catching a few flicks this weekend. As a joke, he threw Katy Perry: Part of Me 3D out there, and, as a joke, I told him that if he wrote a review of it, I’d post it on my blog.
Well, given the lack of tone and context in text messages, at some point, one of us stopped taking the other one seriously, which not only resulted in this poor bastard sitting through the Katy Perry movie last night, but actually writing me a review of it this morning.
After we figured out that something had been seriously lost in translation, I was mortified. I wouldn’t wish a movie like this on my worst enemy, and to make them write 700+ words on it is utter torture. So, to try and save face, here is Evan’s review of Katy Perry: Part of Me 3D in all its glory. Thank god for Evan, he as willing to go where very few of us are.
Katy Perry: Part of Me 3D, review by Evan Djukic
I've never listened to Katy Perry’s music, so I honestly had no idea what to expect when I pulled open the theater door to her new 3D movie. I can, however, say that I genuinely felt embarrassed when it came time to hand my ticket to the usher. And once I settled into my seat in the nearly empty auditorium, I was ready for anything.
Katy Perry begins with several confessions from fans about how Katy's music has changed their lives. None of which are convincing because they're being said by 10 year olds. Eventually, we transition into the formulaic outline for every film like this: interviews with friends and family members, the subject’s basic life story, the struggle to find success, with concert footage mixed in throughout.
There were, in all honesty, moments that genuinely interested me. For example, I was unaware that Perry grew up in a very strict Pentecostal home where her parents were traveling preachers. But while interesting, this certainly wasn't enough to make the film worthy.
Not being familiar with Perry's singing career, I believe the live concert footage is what upset me the most. It's just way too much. You've got outlandish costumes, enormous sets, dozens of background dancers, etc. It's all so choreographed and forced. As the friend seated next to me said, “It's like Dr. Seuss on Acid.”
I always take issue with musical acts that focus less on music and more about putting on a show. Once you take away the costumes and sets, you've got the same generic, unoriginal pop that already floods the market. As one Perry fan remarks in the film, “I love that her lyrics come from life experiences.” I'm not sure I can name a musician whose lyrics don't come from life experiences.
The film attempts to inject drama by following Perry as she goes through her ups and downs with her then-husband Russell Brand, who briefly appears in a few scenes and says merely a word or two. There's never any attempt to establish an emotional connection to their relationship, and eventually, as we all know, they divorce and we're subjected to Perry's depression.
There is a scene very late in the film that contains a genuine moment of authenticity that makes the rest of the film feel staged and safe. After Perry’s relationship has hit rock bottom, she sits weeping backstage before a show. She debates canceling the show, but is soon helped up by her crew, and as she makes her way to the stage, she perks up, smiles and heads out like nothing’s wrong. Amongst the overdone, glittery mess of the rest of the film, there was this pleasing cinematic moment.
Katy Perry spends a great deal of time discussing the singer’s initial struggle for success, which was not the least bit captivating. Virtually every musician has struggled early on in his or her career - this isn't anything to write home about, we've seen it all before.
It may sound like I'm being too harsh or brash on this film, but I honestly don't see the point in making it, and the box office seems to agree with me. I believe Perry is a genuinely kind and sweet person, as evidenced by the interaction with her fans and crew, but I simply don't see any reason for this to be released in theaters. Sadly, continuing the 3D concert/biography film series that Justin Bieber kicked off last summer, I fully expect a Lady Gaga picture within the next year. D+