Friday, October 9, 2009

Couple's Retreat

Given its title and trailer, you may be tempted to venture into Couple’s Retreat with your significant other. See some famous faces, have a few laughs, and so on. Don’t. For… the… love… of… god.

This movie is flat-out awful. Its 107 minutes produces not one laugh. I’m not exaggerating. That isn’t an hyperbole. I seriously did not laugh once in the entire film. And believe me, I’m a fan of most of the stars, but I suspect that the shooting location was far more appealing to them than the dialogue of the film.

There isn’t a scene acted or a line spoken that doesn’t feel forced and tired. Maybe you chuckled at the preview. Trust me, those are the only one-liners that produce the mildest of smirks. Save your money, stay away, or go see one of the other 20 movies out right now.

2009 is shaping up to be a hell of a year. Couple’s Retreat is right up there with Transformers 2 and Whiteout as the worst films of the decade. Seeing this movie is no retreat. It’s plunging your toilet, unsuccessfully, leaving shit all over the damn place. F


  1. Well, Kristen Bell is always pleasant, but, yeah, there was nothing to see here. I'm struggling to recall why I bothered in the first place... Favreau maybe?

    1. I thought Favreau and Vaughn were just all over the place. Didn't work for me at all. Good news is that I haven't thought about this movie since I first saw it.